COMMENTARY: "Life Rules"

Everyone needs a good set of rules.  Sometimes one rule will do.  Sometimes three is enough.  Sometimes you just need one more.  

There are all kinds of rules in life.  Rules set by society, by religion, by parents or by other authority figures.  Or we set rules for ourselves.  Rules to help us succeed.  Rules to help us survive.  Rules to guide us through difficult times.  Rules to protect us from ourselves…or protect us from others. 

Some people follow the rules.  And some people bend and break them.  Some people ignore them altogether and live as if there are no rules in the first place. 

Me?  I am a rule follower.  Although I may have bent a rule or two in my day, breaking rules has not been a habit of mine.  I’m generally of the opinion that if everyone just followed the rules, the world would be a better place (although, I suppose, it does depend on who makes the rules).  

Most of the time, I find it perfectly acceptable for someone else to make a rule and then I’ll follow it.  It’s not that I don’t like to think for myself; but, rather, that I prefer to have a structured list of what is expected of me so that I know how to judge whether or not I have been successful.  If no one else tells me what I ought to do, I create my own internal list of expectations and use that to determine the quality of my achievement.  I believe many of us create such “life rules”.  

Some “life rules” are easy:  “Compliment one person every day.”  “Always say please and thank you.”  “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.”

Others are tougher:  “Forgive.”  “Apologize.”  “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

And some rules are so nebulous that I can’t even begin to wrap my head around them:  “Be happy.”  “Don’t hold everything inside.”  “Allow yourself to feel.”  

Without rules, life is chaos.  Sometimes you just need one more rule, a guidepost, a line you know you won’t cross, a promise to be a better person for those who love you.   

Because without such “life rules”, all we are doing is just surviving each day with no way of knowing if what we are doing means anything at all. 

BOOK REVIEW: "Saving Fish From Drowning"

Saving Fish from Drowning

By Amy Tan

Copyright 2006

Ballantine Books

Adult Fiction

2 Bookmarks

Spoiler Alert!

One of the best books I've ever read is The Hundred Secret Senses by Amy Tan, although I read that one in my much-younger years.  I saw this, more recent, novel by Tan and decided to pick it up.  With such an intriguing name, Saving Fish from Drowning would surely be a book as good as Senses, right?  In the end, I decided that my primary assessment was incorrect.

To summarize, Saving Fish from Drowning is about a large group of friends who travel together to Burma (Myanmar).  They travel without an important member, Bibi Chen, who planned the trip in the first place but mysteriously died prior to departure (although she is there in spirit as she is the narrator of the story).

The book follows the travelers on some interesting (and some not-so-interesting) adventures, until they are eventually kidnapped by an oppressed tribe who refer to themselves as “The Lord’s Army”. 

It was at about this point in the book that I realized that this was not merely an “escape from real life” story book.  No.  It was, instead, a political commentary on an oppressive regime, which (I’m assuming) is likely still a problem in that particular region.  I hate stuff like that.  From that point on, I just sort of went through the motions of finishing the book.  I’m sorry, but I typically read to escape; not to find out more about the horrible things that horrible governments and horrible religions do to people in this world.  If I wanted to read that kind of stuff I would stick with non-fiction.  Or watch Fox News.

It’s not that I want to stick my head in the sand and never know anything that’s going on; it’s just a survival mechanism, I suppose.  To survive, I have to think about the good things in life instead of suffocating in the bad.

Anyway, so I did eventually finish the book and realize the intent of the book title.  The “moral of the story”, if you will, seemed to be that even though us “westerners” go into these types of areas to try to help the oppressed people, it just ends up making things worse for them (at least that seemed to be the author’s take on things—that we think we are “saving” them, but instead we are “drowning” them). 

I disagreed with the premise and only found some of the story interesting.  I also thought the whole “mysterious death of Bibi Chen” thing (that really didn’t have anything to do with anything other than to create a narrator for the story), was a weird distraction.  Not one I would recommend.  

BOOK REVIEW: "Mistress of Nothing"

Mistress of Nothing
By Kate Pullinger
Copyright 2011
Touchstone Publishing
Adult Fiction
3.5 Bookmarks

I just really liked the title of this one (it also had an enchanting cover which, as you know, always makes me pick a book up). 

The Mistress of Nothing chronicles ladies maid Sally as she travels to drier lands with her mistress who is ill and trying to escape death by tuberculosis.  Leaving England is not too difficult for Sally, as she has always enjoyed escaping her domestic life by visiting museums.  Sally is also extremely loyal to her mistress and willing to do (almost) anything for her.

It is only when things take a decidedly different turn for Sally that things get really interesting. 

Stuck in a house in a small village in Egypt with only her mistress and a new-found freedom, Sally finds her way into a difficult situation with choices she isn't prepared to make. 

The author does a fabulous job of pulling the reader into Sally's world; a world of loyalty, love, and power.  The scenery is described with beautiful detail and even the mundane daily tasks become intriguing with the author's crisp prose.

I didn't want to put the book down because I just knew it was leading to some gripping climax.  I didn't have to wait too long. 

My thoughts about the ending of the book are a bit mixed.  I won't go into the details (spoilers, you know), but I was a bit sad with the way things turned out.  I could think of a few other endings that would definitely have been better.

Every time I read a book that I'm enjoying, I seem to not like the ending.  Sometimes it's just because it's the end and I don't want it to be over.  Sometimes it's because the author just got to the good part.  Sometimes it's because the story took a wrong turn and ended up somewhere it shouldn't have been.  Sometimes I think I could have written it better.  Perhaps someday I will.
 

BOOK REVIEW: "Home to Woefield"

Home to Woefield
By Susan Juby
Copyright 2011
HarperCollins Publishers
Adult Fiction
3 Bookmarks

Has it really been so long since I've posted a new review?  Sheesh.  Time flies. 

On to the review.  Home to Woefield is a story about a young(ish) city girl who finds out she has inherited an old farm from a distant relative.  She jumps at the chance to go live at the farm and make a go of it.

When she arrives at the farm, however, she finds that things aren't exactly as she'd hoped.  With a falling down house, one sheep, and not much actual farming to speak of,  Prudence still doesn't give up.  Making due with what she has and trying to come up with creative ways to save the farm result in a somewhat entertaining read.

In typical fiction format, Prudence brings together a band of misfits to help her cause.  A crotchety old man, a know-it-all kid who raises chickens, and an alcoholic 20-something neighbor are the main cast of characters. 

With the farm on the line, Prudence pulls out all the stops and....well, I wouldn't want to spoil it so I won't tell you how it ends.

As expected, this wasn't a very deep or meaningful story that makes for a good discussion (actually, I haven't read one of those in awhile, but I hope to be able to soon).  But it was a fun and quick read and had some entertaining moments. 

I don't think I would really recommend this for a book club or anything like that.  More of a "sit on the beach and listen to the waves coming in while you relax" kind of read. 

Truly, I need to find something a little more meaningful to make me think. 

BOOK REVIEW: "The Custom of the Country"

The Custom of the Country

By Edith Wharton

Original Copyright 1913

Charles Scribner’s Sons Publisher

Published by Penguin Books 1990

Classic Literature

3.75 Bookmarks

Spoiler Alert!

I try to throw a few “classics” into my reading queue every now and again, usually as more of a reminder of times gone by than anything else.  Sometimes I’m bored out of my ever-loving mind, but with this one I was actually pleasantly surprised!    

The Custom of the Country is the story of the delightfully unlikable Undine Spragg, the daughter of an up-and-coming New York family who move out of the sticks to introduce their daughter to “society”.  While Undine thrives in her new social entanglements, she does have hopes for finding a suitable spouse (which is not easy after some youthful indiscretions, including a quickly-unraveled elopement with a man who seems to continually pop up in her new world). 

Undine is a manipulative little narcissist and usually manages to get whatever she wants.  But when hiding her past becomes a difficulty, Undine rushes into the first advantageous marriage she can find.  Her new husband has entrée into society, of course.  But, as Undine later discovers, his finances are not in the best condition, nor does he have the ability to change those circumstances.  Undine, who had grown accustomed to always having her way and being able to manipulate her parents into giving her everything, becomes increasingly frustrated and dissatisfied at her new financial constraints.  Her husband tries to fulfill her wants, but soon discovers the pitfalls of his bridal choice.

When Undine finds herself in a situation that could lead to a future with another man (a man with money, of course), but only if each of them could obtain their own respective divorces, she throws herself headlong into the process without even a second thought.  Then when the “other man” ends up not wanting her (shocker!), Undine seeks a new sugar daddy and finds one rather quickly, or so she thinks.  Despite his impressive French title, however, husband #3 has dedicated his slice of the financial pie elsewhere and merely rolls his eyes at Undine’s voracious appetite for spending money, locking her down into a quiet domestic life that she absolutely abhors. 

Dumb luck being what it is, Undine runs into hubby #1 again (you know, the one she eloped with WAYYYYYY back when) and wouldn’t you know it?  He is now rich beyond the dreams of Avarice.  You can just imagine how this turns out.

Things I loved about this book:

#1.  I absolutely detested everything about the main character of the book, which kept me reading to see what she was going to do, think or feel next.  One of the lines that best describes this character: “…Undine felt the rush of physical joy that drowns scruples and silences memory.”

#2. Near the end of the book, with Undine in her latest marriage and spending more money than you can even imagine, she STILL is not satisfied.  The author notes, “Even now, however, she was not always happy.  She had everything she wanted, but she still felt, at times, that there were other things she might want if she knew about them.” So in the end, she really didn't get everything she wanted.

#3.  The author actually uses the word “tessellated” in a sentence. One of my favorite Alt-J songs:

Although it had a few sections that were a little slow and yawn-worthy, it was generally entertaining and kept me intrigued.  I do recommend this one for anyone who is a fan of Victorian-style writings.   

BOOK REVIEW: "Astray"

Astray
By Emma Donoghue
Copyright 2012
Little, Brown & Company
Short Story Collection
1 Bookmark

What a disappointment.  I gave high marks to a previous book by this author, Room, reviewed here.  I suppose I expected something along the same writing style with the clever twists one normally finds in short story collections.  Instead, the author provides an assortment of stories with a somewhat historical relationship, but I never really felt like the tie-in made much sense.

A synopsis of the book I read before adding it to my queue indicated the stories would all be related to some kind of travel.  But the theme was really more about people immigrating or living somewhere that was not their place of birth. 

None of the stories was really all that interesting, in and of themselves.  I did think the last story in the collection, called "What Remains", was at least somewhat well-written and had some heart to it.  But many of the other stories carried a kind of "ick" factor that was hard for me to ignore. 

The only really interesting thing about this collection, in my opinion, was the slight historic twist in each of the stories.  The author took a little-known fact, based off historic letters or newspaper accounts, and wrapped a fictional story around that small piece of history.  Sometimes it worked, other times it seemed extremely contrived.

I didn't really care for most of these stories.  Nearly all of them had some sort of deviant, disturbing or sexual piece to them that was really the only "twist" in the story at all.  The first story in the collection called "Man and Boy" details an incident regarding an elephant that is sold from one circus to another and the weirdly loving relationship between the elephant and his caretaker.  Another story, "Daddy's Girl" tells about a young woman dealing with her father's death, further complicated by the fact that upon his death it was discovered her father was a woman.

Nor did I think any of the stories really gave us anything useful or heartfelt to take away from them, with the possible exception of "What Remains".  I kind of felt like I wasted a lot of valuable reading time getting through Astray. 

Going to have to say that I really don't recommend this one. 

BOOK REVIEW: "Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life"

"Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life"
By Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D.
Copyright 2006
Vintage Books
Non-Fiction
4 Bookmarks

I know I've been a slacker on the book-review front lately.  Busy life with work and family the last couple of months, but I have had the chance to read a couple of books in that time. 

My reading "theme" lately has been books that might help to improve my attitude.  Stress is just a killer for positivity, after all. 

I discovered this gem from a list of recommended reading in one of my other recent reads, How Children Succeed by Paul Tough, reviewed here. 

Sometimes I "may" have a bit of a negative attitude, and this book has a great way of explaining why.  According to the author, the way we explain things to ourselves has a profound impact on the way we view the world around us. 

"Self-talk", in other words, is sort of a self-fulfilling prophesy.  Seligman uses several examples of areas in our lives that are impacted profoundly simply by the way we talk to ourselves about them.

Everyone has a thinking style, but Seligman asserts that we all have the ability to change the way we internally explain the reasons behind the things we experience and, thus, change the way we think.

My opinion of the book was pretty good.  I felt like the author did a great job explaining "why" we think the way we do.  It was easy to apply it to my own internal "talk" and, of course, attitude.

Anyone who reads this book can take the quick optimism assessment and learn about their own thinking style.  The author then gives many tools for changing that thinking style into something more positive.

I actually got a lot out of the book and felt it was definitely worth the read.  The author goes to great lengths to help you see how the thinking styles can apply to many different areas of our lives: family, athletics, school, work, health, etc.

Lots of good info in this one. 

BOOK REVIEW: "How Children Succeed"

How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character
By Paul Tough
Copyright 2012
Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing
Non-Fiction

4.5 Bookmarks

This one was recommended to me by a friend who happens to be a school teacher.  I was looking for some way to encourage my daughter to be a little more focused on the important things in life and she told me about this book.  Interestingly enough, the principal at my daughter's middle school also mentioned this book at Back to School Night, which was another good recommendation!

I started off with the expectation that I would find ways in this book to help my daughter be successful.  Instead, I found some fascinating information, based on case studies and real life examples of Paul Tough's main assertion, which is that success is based more on a child's character rather than their intelligence.  Skills, such as optimism, perseverance and "grit", are more likely to lead a child to success than just simply being smart.

Tough asserts that parents are more influential with these characteristics than anyone else.  Studies show that children who come from stressful backgrounds (abject poverty, divorce, chaotic homes) have altered brain chemistry that makes it more difficult for them to form and keep the character skills necessary to be most successful in life.

Schools are leaning on this research as they add more intensive character-development programs to their curriculum to give children additional support in developing these important characteristics.  But it really comes down to the parents.  Do you hug your child every day?  Does your child feel safe?  Does your child feel loved?

This book explained a lot of my own characteristics, but also helped me to see that the best ways to help my daughter be successful may not be by pushing her to study more, or work harder, or be more organized (as much as my OCD-self would LOVE for her to do those things!)  It comes down to making sure she has a safe environment, doesn't feel threatened, and has the security to be able to devote the portions of her brain necessary to develop good character.

How Children Succeed was a great book, but it had a few too many anecdotes and not quite enough "what to do about it" stuff.  With a little more "how to", it may have gotten 5 bookmarks.  But still, a very important read for anyone who has children or works with children.  Read this one!

BOOK REVIEW: "The Buddha in the Attic"

The Buddha in the Attic
By Julie Otsuka
Copyright 2011
Alfred A. Knopf, Publisher
Historical Fiction

4 Bookmarks

A poignant look at Japanese "picture brides" brought to San Francisco in the early 20th century. These girls and women were married to Japanese immigrants without ever having met, only seeing a picture of the man they married, then leaving their families and setting sail for the United States and a new life without knowing anything that was in store for them. 

The book is written in a beautiful sing-song fashion that feels like a poem.  It is the story of numerous women, not just one, and gives an all-encompassing description of the lives these women traveled into.  The women who arrived only to find the picture they'd been sent was 20 years old...or belonged to another man.  The women who arrived to find lives as migrant workers, instead of the beautiful homes with white picket fences that their husbands had described to them.  They arrived to find harsh lives and sacrifice awaiting them, instead of the opportunity they had been promised.  They arrived to find harsh judgment from their new countrymen, and found it easier to live in secluded areas surrounded by their own.

Eventually the women experience childbirth, the good and the bad that go along with it. They experience the joy of motherhood and the grief of lost children. They also experience condemnation due to the color of their skin and shape of their eyes when Japan attacks Pearl Harbor.  And, eventually, they disappear into nameless internment camps across the country.

The book is written in the first person, "Some of us chanted Buddhist sutras while we worked and the hours flew by like minutes," "We simply worked. That was all," or "We were the best breed of worker they had ever hired in their lives."  Each sentence describing another person in the "we", another experience, another feeling.

I liked the style of this one, the emotions it brought up, and the bits of history from a time in our country we would be hard-pressed to truly understand.  A quick and heart-felt read.  Good for a book club, or just a rainy Saturday afternoon. 



  

BOOK REVIEW: "Nothing Happens Until It Happens To You"

Nothing Happens Until it Happens to You: A Novel Without Pay, Perks, or Privileges
By T.M. Shine
Copyright 2010
Crown Publishers
Adult Fiction

3 Bookmarks

Well, here's another of your fairly typical "Oh my heavens! I just got laid-off!" books.  Perhaps in the current employment climate, that's appropriate.  This one, though, was pretty humorous, even from the beginning. 

Jeffrey Reiner is a low-key newspaper guy.  Only he really doesn't do much at his job.  Like, really not much at all.  Instead, he socializes a lot, and comes up with crazy ideas that don't really go anywhere.  And, it seems, the economy and his lack of productivity finally catch up to him and he's on the chopping block. 

He starts out his unemployment by doing all the things he's supposed to do (encouraged by his highly-energetic wife, Anna); filing for unemployment, seeing an employment counselor, working on a resume, etc.  But soon his enthusiasm fizzles out and he starts really freaking out about the small number of days he has left on unemployment.  This soon leads him to start grasping at employment straws; i.e. hooking up with a guy known only as 'enterprising dude', who puts him to work in a Statue of Liberty costume, delivering pizzas, and eventually breeding fish in a muddy trough.  All the while, Jeffrey worries about where his wife is and what she is up to, as it seems she is having an affair with a drug salesman (the legal kind). 

As Jeffrey goes a little crazy and his world starts spinning around him, he has a few epiphanies and big garage sale and that's pretty much the end of the story.  Didn't care for the lack of resolution at the end, but there were some pretty funny moments in the book, and it was generally well-written.  Just not a great ending. 

BOOK REVIEW: "Organizing the Disorganized Child"

Organizing the Disorganized Child: Simple Strategies to Succeed in School
By Martin L. Kutscher & Marcella Moran
Copyright 2009
HarperCollins Publishing
Non-Fiction

3.5 Bookmarks

Stuck at home recovering from a cold has finally given me the opportunity to catch up a little on my writing.  I read this little ditty at the beginning of the school year for my now middle-schooler.  Love her dearly, but organization has not been her strong suit over the years.

While it had some great suggestions for standard organization, some of the ideas don't work with all children.  Getting an organized homework area set up is a great idea, but keeping it organized and usable is an entirely different story!  Setting up a single binder or notebook for each subject is a great idea, but when the student doesn't remember to write notes in the correct notebook, it sort of defeats the purpose.

One of the best suggestions in the book was to have an assignment calendar on the wall of the homework area so the student can keep track of upcoming assignments.  If only those assignments would write themselves on that calendar, though, because the child doesn't ever remember to do it.  

My favorite parts of the book were the "how to take a test" section and the "how to take notes" section.  With lots of great tips and practical information, these seemed like areas we could really improve on and utilize.  Wish I had known some of these strategies when I was in school! 

I do wish the book had had more guidance on teaching the value of organization, not necessarily just the basic "where to file papers" stuff.  So much of the book was just very basic and practical information. I was hoping for something a little more in-depth to really address the nitty-gritty problems associated with disorganization. 

BOOK REVIEW: "The Portrait of a Lady"

The Portrait of a Lady

By Henry James

Original Copyright 1881

Current Copyright by Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

Classic Literature

2 Bookmarks

Ahhh yes.  Just what you wanted.  A book that took me a full two months to read.  I'm sure this will be on top of everyone's reading list knowing THAT little bit of information.

I've actually tried to read this book before.  The last time I tried to read it, I only made it in about eight pages before I was bored silly.  But I was reminded that this is a classic; I decided there had to be some redeeming quality to it, so I gave it another chance.  Booooo on me. 

The Portrait of a Lady begins on the lawn of an old English country house, with some boring dialogue between a Lord, the owner of the house and his sickly son.  Not a lady in sight.  Eventually, the lady in question does show up; Isabel Archer, whose great plans in life involve NEVER letting a man make any decisions for her. 

Isabel is in the unfortunate position, however, of having every man she meets fall in love with her.  As these "gentlemen" fall all over themselves to do everything they can to woo the "lady" (who, by the way, never really seemed to have enough redeeming qualities to warrant such attention), she simply lets them down as gently as she can and moves on to the next man. 

The hilarity of that is evident when poor Miss Archer finally chooses a husband and really chooses the wrong guy for all the wrong reasons.  Unhappiness ensues. 

I never really "got" the purpose of the book.  And, frankly, was pretty disappointed with the conclusion.  There were a few chuckle-worthly paragraphs of dialogue and a few witty lines here and there, such as Isabel's attempt to avoid having to view a tedious collection belonging to one of her suitors by stating, "I don't want to know anything more - I know too much already. The more you know the more unhappy you are."  Or the description of her jealousy of her cousin, "She envied Ralph his dying, for if one were thinking of rest that was the most perfect of all.  To cease utterly, to give it all up and not know anything more - this idea was as sweet as the vision of a cool bath in a marble tank, in a darkened chamber, in a hot land." 

A truly disappointing waste of a large number of hours of my time. 

BOOK REVIEW: "The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship"

The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship

By Lisa Verge Higgins

Copyright 2011

Hachette Book Group

Adult Fiction

4 Bookmarks

Oh what a fabulous find this book was!  Highly recommend this one to any reader who appreciates a friend, has an unrequited love, or has ever lost someone important to them.  Higgins does a fabulous job of tying together the lives of four friends who each bring their own experiences and circumstances to the table. 

When Rachel is diagnosed with a terminal illness, she does what she thinks best by giving a last request to each of her friends.  As the friends determine how to accomplish the tasks given to them, they find out some amazing things about themselves, but they also find out more about Rachel and who she was as a person.

Jo is faced with demons from her past as she turns her whole world upside-down to take over where Rachel left off.  A true rags to riches girl, Jo has to become a person she never thought she would be.

Sarah was my favorite character in the book.  The free-spirited Doctors Without Borders nurse who lives her life in the third world has spent 14 years longing for a man she once had a brief fling with.  When forced to find out once and for all if there is still any connection, she comes to a surprising realization.

For Kate, doing something to re-ignite the spark in her marriage has been an impossibility.  When Rachel tasks her with stepping well outside her comfort zone, Kate realizes she has more inside her than she ever thought possible.

This book would be great for a book club, or just a fantastic vacation read.  It was written with such love and care, it was easy to fall in love with every single character.  I was sad when I got to the last page. 

BOOK REVIEW: "Fear and Yoga in New Jersey"

Fear and Yoga in New Jersey

By Debra Galant

Copyright 2008

St. Martin's Press

Adult Fiction

3.5 Bookmarks

Yes, once again I have picked up a book solely because I liked the title.  I've never seen the movie "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas", but I have heard of it and thought this was a clever little plagiaristic twist. 

Okay, on to the story.  This is definitely a "story" story, about a New Jersey family living the life.  The mom, Nina, has just opened her own yoga studio, but is continually faced with bad luck, perhaps due to some unpleasant feng shui left over from the previous tenant.  The dad, Michael, has been laid off and his family faces financial turmoil as he deals with the emotional implications of being unemployed.  Their son, Adam, is a typical materialistic teenager who grows ever more jealous of a certain Jewish girl in his school who is showered with gifts and an enormous party for her bat mitzvah.  Adam decides he wants to embraces his half-Jewishness so he can have a big party and tons of gifts, too.  

The author throws in a set of meddling in-laws, some mob connections, a lawsuit and an overzealous TSA agent for a twisting and turning series of plot lines and side stories.  I was certainly never bored while reading this one, and actually, it was a bit tough to put down. 

With a little bit of a slapstick style, Galant brings the characters to life and winds the story up into a tornado before bringing it to its somewhat simplistic resolution.  It was a fun read!

BOOK REVIEW: "Living (Well!) with Gastroparesis"

Living (Well!) with Gastroparesis

By Crystal Zaborowski Saltrelli CHC

Copyright 2011

Self-published

Non-fiction

3.5 Bookmarks

So in the ongoing saga that is my health, after a recent visit to the emergency room and five weeks of testing, I was finally diagnosed with a condition called Gastroparesis.  I had never heard of such a thing and had to research to find out what it was, how it was going to impact me, and how I was going to manage it. 

A lot of the information available online was the same: since there is no cure, and very few treatment options, most guidance is really just about how to control the condition through diet.

I found a great website called Living with Gastroparesis and I ordered this book from the author.

The book is organized with different sections addressing the basics of the condition, treatment options, nutrition, lifestyle and coping.  I really liked the way the book was written in a question and answer format, since I have had many of the same questions myself.  The author, who suffers from the condition herself, has spent years researching it and learning how best to cope with the symptoms. She shares her knowledge and experiences in a very sympathetic and informational way.

Another section of the book that I found really useful was the recipe section.  Having some additional options for food choices was great! 

My only real disappointments with the book were that it was a bit simplistic (written at a very easy reading level, which may actually be a positive to some people), and also that it didn't have a "magic pill" for fixing all this (I think most people with chronic conditions are continually searching for such a thing).  For anyone with this condition, "Living (Well!) with Gastroparesis" is a must have.  May also be of interest to dieticians and nutritionists, as most don't know much about the condition.  Probably not really of interest to anyone else.

BOOK REVIEW: "Garden Spells"

Garden Spells

By Sarah Addison Allen

Copyright 2007

Bantam Books

Adult Fiction

4 Bookmarks

I don't normally read too many fantasy-type books, but this one had just the right touch of magic.  In Garden Spells, we are introduced to the Waverly family.  Each member has a special gift.  Evanelle has a tendency to give people things that they only later on realize they need (two quarters for someone who, days later, needs to make an emergency call; new sheets for someone who suddenly receives a surprise visitor, etc.)  Sydney is a Waverly sister with a knack for cutting hair in such a way that it brings out the very best in a person's apearance. Bay is Sydney's daughter.  She knows where things belong; where a fixture in a house belongs, where a person belongs. 

And then there's Claire.  Claire lives in a special home with a special apple tree in the backyard.  Anyone who eats one of that tree's apples will see the most important event of their life happen.  The herbs in Claire's garden are also special.  They help Claire to make delightful foods for her catering business that help people to see things in a different light; a woman who wants her husband to notice her more, a person who wants their friend to show more understanding, and discouraging unwanted attention from a new neighbor.

The author does a great job of weaving the mystical elements into the story without it feeling like a mystery.  This is just the world of the Waverly's and everyone in the small town where they live knows it.  It was a fun story, a quick read, and would be great for a women's book club. 

BOOK REVIEW: "The Golden Prince"

The Golden Prince

By Rebecca Dean

Copyright 2010

Broadway Paperbacks

Adult Fiction

3 Bookmarks

What happens when a prince who is destined to rule England falls in love with a commoner?  This is a fictional tale about the controversy surrounding Prince Edward in the early 1900s and his refusal to accept the expectations of his position.  Prince Edward (David, as he is known to his family) falls in love with Lily Houghton and tries every possible way to disobey the king's command that he marry a princess.  His father, instead, sends him away and thinks he has put his son far from the tempting situation. 

But the distance only makes David more sure of what he wants.  He decides he will refuse to take the crown and will pass his kingly torch to his brother Albert.  Lily knows that David will make a wonderful king and decides that she, a simple commoner, cannot be the reason for David to give up his birthright. 

The result is unhappiness for all involved parties.  Prince Edward (David), although he is eventually crowned as king, refuses to marry the princess his parents had courted on his behalf. 

I don't care for stories that end sadly, but this one had so much that was based in fact that I truly enjoyed the historical nature of it.  Although we don't know the exact circumstances of this time in Prince Edward's life, we do know that he later on does abdicate the throne to his brother Albert, who becomes a great leader during World War II.  Nice historic touch to this one. 

BOOK REVIEW: "Love Walked In"

Love Walked In

By Marisa de los Santos

Copyright 2006

Penguin Books, Ltd.

Adult Fiction

3 Bookmarks

I hate stories with an "ick" factor.  And this wasn't your typical "ick" either.  This is a story about Cornelia Brown who is waiting for her prince to ride in on a white horse.  Well, more specifically, she is waiting for Cary Grant to show up in her life.  Fixated with the old, classic love story movies, Cornelia's dates just never seem to measure up.  That is, until Martin Grace enters her life.  Not only is he the spitting image of Cary Grant, but he is a true gentleman besides! 

Cornelia thinks she is in love, but there's just something that's not quite right. 

In the meantime, the story flashes to 11-year-old Clare Hobbes.  Clare's mother is slipping deeper and deeper into psychosis every day until Clare is faced with the realization that her mother can no longer care for her.  Estranged from her uncaring and mostly absentee father, Clare doesn't feel she has anywhere to turn.  When she realizes things have become dire, Clare makes a desperate phone call to her father to tell him what is going on.  He doesn't listen and casts her worries aside, as Clare had expected he would.  So Clare makes a plan.  She creates lists for how to make it through each day so that no one finds out what is going on and takes her away from her mother.  She manages for quite some time, but then her mother takes off, abandoning her completely, and her father is the only one to turn to. 

Clare's father, of course, has no clue how to handle the situation, and even less clue how to comfort Clare over the loss of her mother and the fact that he had ignored her previous concerns.  It is only when her father's girlfriend Cornelia steps in and holds her during her tears that Clare finally feels safe. 

Cornelia, of course, cannot understand why Martin has no connection with his child, especially when she falls in love with her within minutes.  And frankly, as the reader, I couldn't understand it either.  I felt decidedly uncomfortable with the thought that there are parents out there who feel absolutely no connection with their child at all, and what can happen as a result of that.  Ick. 

The ending does make up for some of the ickiness, but I was definitely uncomfortable reading some of the passages in the book.  As a parent of an 11-year-old, I was just sickened at the thought of such a young child feeling so unloved and having to be so grown up.

BOOK REVIEW: "Safe Haven"

Safe Haven

By Nicholas Sparks

Copyright 2010

Grand Central Publishing

Adult Fiction

4.5 Bookmarks

Okay, so maybe I have a little secret crush on Nicholas Sparks (I do keep reading his books, after all).  But this one was a little bit of a departure from his typical lighthearted love story. 

The main character, Erin, has escaped her abusive cop husband and is hiding as Katie in a small town far, far away from her previously life.  Katie works as a waitress and keeps to herself, until she meets a widower named Alex, and a new neighbor named Jo.  Katie opens up a bit to Jo, and then Alex and his two children become friends with Katie.  She eventually lets her guard down enough to consider the possibility of that friendship becoming more.  As Sparks develops those relationships, the story flashes back periodically to her abusive marriage and the intricate planning she had to go through in order to escape.  It also focuses on her husband, Kevin, who has never stopped looking for her and is spiralling deeper and deeper into an alcohol-induced psychosis. 

I didn't want to put this book down until I found out how it ended (so many of Sparks' stories, after all, have sad endings).  And I don't want to spoil it for you, but the twist at the end was a good one!  I really enjoyed the character development, especially Erin/Katie, who showed extreme strength in overcoming the obstacles that she faced in her life.  I have always had a soft place in my heart for women who are trapped in situations that they cannot get out of, and her character definitely showed through.  The book had just the right amount of suspense and storytelling.  This would be a great book club read! 

BOOK REVIEW: "Girls in White Dresses"

Girls in White Dresses

By Jennifer Close

Copyright 2011
Knopf, Borzoi Books Random House
Adult Fiction
2 Bookmarks

A somewhat tamer version of "Sex and the City", this faintly entertaining tale of three friends who deal with the constant pressure of other friends getting married and having babies ended up being a little bit disappointing by the end. 

Lauren, Isabella and Mary pop in and out of each other's lives, and the lives of too many other friends to list.  The story basically follows the three who navigate their way through different jobs, different boyfriends, singleton times, and all sorts of craziness and jealousy.  Of course, everything pretty much works out in the end (you wouldn't have expected anything to the contrary with as predictable as the storyline flowed).

But the author was pretty good at creating fun anecdotes and side stories so I wasn't ever really bored reading it.  The story just lacked any meaning or real purpose.  I didn't really care about any of the characters by the time I was done reading it and the whole "adults who's lives aren't keeping up with their friends' lives" theme is so overdone, I was just underwhelmed by this one.